Kamakura: Conversations with Kyoko
by Eliza Kurosawa
Summary: "All it really takes is having that hope. And taking a leap of faith. That's all it starts with." Makoto and Kyoko have a important conversation.


Fear and Dispair. A perfect duo, by the admission of Monokuma. Something, through the crazed efforts of that bicolored bear, that every student at Hope's Peak felt ooze into their pathetic and resigned existences between the suffocating walls of their forced school home. While he hated the idea of it, despair and fear were starting to input themselves into Makoto.

Which scared him to no end. Especially after everything that just commenced. The images of...her father...everything about that room kept sticking into his eyelids like hot glue. Every moment he closed his eyes...all he saw was Kyoko's father. His remains forced and nicely compacted into a little box that had the finish of beautiful little bow. A hopeful appearance snipped away by the emanating grasp of disparity.

The images kept following Makoto, no matter where he went. He needed a breather, he could stand to stay there anymore after Kyoko strolled off. He felt...so sick to his stomach, the bile felt that it was going to rise at any moment. It was as if it was going to rip through his digestive track and spill from his lips. Which sent him into a frenzy as he sped towards his room, fumbling to yank the card-key out of his jacket pocket with one hand while with his other he attempted to keep the bile at bay.

Makoto didn't know what it was this time...he puked sometimes before when seeing his **_f_**_**riends'** _lifeless bodies mangled and destroyed, releasing all sense of mortality they still retained. Those were people he knew, people he came to admire and hold close to his heart. People he came to...love and see as his own family. Which was why seeing their deaths yanked his sense of will from his soul.

Why was it though? Why did a stranger's death creep up inside of him? Why was he letting it infect that seemingly vast and endless hope within him? Was it the stench of burnt rubble that exploded from the box? Perhaps the scent of, somehow, still burning flesh? The smell of death rising up into his nostrils? Infecting his body, reaching every single inch of his body no matter how far?

Makoto bursts into his room, slamming the door behind him and forcing open his bathroom. Partly, he struggled at first before he was able to remember that the door, even after all this time, wasn't fixed.

For some reason that availed him, he saw Sayaka's lifeless body on the floor. Yet...it wasn't lifeless. Her eyes were bulging. Staring at him as if they were possessed by something otherworldly. The skin around the eyelids was stretched and widened to the point it started to bleed. Fresh, crimson blood kept flowing and flowing. Making Makoto freeze dead in his tracks, eyes wide and his knees feeling as if they were going to collapse in on themselves and forcing him to fall.

_"Ma Ko To~" _Monokuma, Leon and her spoke at once.

Green fluid exploded like a nuclear bomb from his mouth, forcing him to bend over the toilet. His eyes clenched shut as he felt sweat oozing from his forehead. His stomach felt as if it was attempting its hardest to disconnect itself from his torso. It was bending, twisting and contorting like it was at its closest to ripping itself from his body.

Even some blood came out.

Makoto slammed back into the tile. His body felt so...numb. His back placed against the glass. Sayaka appeared once again, but it was as if she was made out of TV static. Flicking in and out of his mindscape.

This was it. A perfect example.

Monokuma was...a sick conundrum of the things he loved the best. Yin and Yang, he once described himself to Makoto when he popped in on the young ultimate-less boy.

**_"My colors aren't just a combination of contrasting things, they're a representation of how there's similarity even in opposites and even constants. White is hope, but even in that hope...there's going to be fear...and that darkness of despair contains fear too, even with the hope being able to blossom a little until it gets crushed out. Even then...outside of my colors...I'm apart of a grand representation~. Now, Makoto, hey you should probably get out of your bed~"_**

The speech, no matter how much Makoto would repeat it in his head, made no sense to him. Er...well...he didn't want to accept what Monokuma said. Hope, even if it formulated in the worse of conditions, _**will** _prosper and blossom. That's how humanity has grown throughout their tenure on this Earth. That was Monokuma's, and the Mastermind's fatal mistake that during this trial...Makoto wanted to exploit...

No...not wanted, that he would exploit. For everyone to live and return to the outside world. To continue living for everyone's sacrifices to not be null and void. That was his goal. His motivation. His boundless hope.

Something that Makoto would see done, even if it meant his own death.

Mentally reaffirming himself, Sayaka flickered off permanently. Something that brought a faint smile to his fatigued face. He wiped some bile away from his lips and, albeit, wobbly forced himself to stand. Using walls as supports to guide himself to his bed, Makoto eventually flopped onto his bed and laid. His eyes lingering in the ceiling.

**_Crap...the trial..._**

**_I was doing all of that when I forgot about the trial...when I forgot about Kyoko._**

**_...that's why..._**

A hand laid itself onto his eyes, blanketing him in a sea of pitch black.

A faint chuckle came from his mouth, **_I was over here puking in toilets and completely forgot to check on Kyoko...but...either way I don't even know where she is..._**

**_The trial is going to commence soon...ah...I shouldn't waste any time! This trial is what determines our lives, I have to get everyone out of here...can't just sit around and ponder._**

**_She isn't just going to magically come to me. Just...gotta figure out where she would be, right?_**

Three simple knocks rang out from his door. Lightly making Makoto jolt from his resting position on the bed. His mind started to wonder, considering who could be knocking at his door at this seemingly pivotal point in the investigation.

**_Oh, Christ who would even knock on my door at this time—_**

**_It's a surprise attack!_**

Makoto slapped himself in the forehead for that thought.

**_No...maybe...Byakuya? No...that doesn't make any sense...he wouldn't waste anything on me._**

**_Aoi...? ...M-Maybe I would like that, but I doubt it..._**

**_Toko? Dear god I hope it isn't her...my room is dusty...I don't need her sneezing..._**

**_If Hiro came I wouldn't be surprised in the slightest..._**

**_Welp. It probably is Hiro._**

A dejected but relieved sigh flowed from Makoto's mouth, his steps towards the door being rejuvenated with a sense of calm. Hiro, even if it was a little, could help him get some worry lightly off his chest. Wouldn't be a lot, but it would help in the long run.

Opening up his door, a predetermined smile started to form on his face, "Hey Hiro—"

It dropped immediately.

Somberness quickly injected itself into Makoto's veins, making a chill spread through himself.

Course it would happen. When he was staring at the one person his mind just couldn't stop worrying and mulling over.

Kyoko's purple eyes stared deep into Makoto. It felt as if he was getting lost in those pools she had. That would've happened if it wasn't for him noticing that her eyes seemed...heavier than usual. Red lined the edges of her eyes, her lavender hair seemed to be messier. Just by a little. Something, that to Makoto, was a massive red flag.

He stared at her some more, his eyes wondering and picking at every portion of her pale body she had.

**_Everything else seems...normal—_**

A snap quickly expressed itself from her fingers, "Oi, my eyes are up here, Makoto. And, I didn't come here to just stand outside of your door the entire time until the trial started."

He nervously scratched his hair, his voice coming out in a nervous janky flow, "R-Right..."

She walked past him, her eyes starting to be lured around the room. A few scenes flashed in her head. The first murder investigation, investigating every nook and cranny of his room. Finding little things that she hasn't even acknowledged to him. The best part to her? Finding Makoto sprawled out on the floor. Which, admittedly, despite the context was rather cute. He had a nice resting face.

Kyoko shook her head, realizing that this wasn't the time to be thinking of such unimportant things.

She sat down on his bed, her posture slopping over to reveal the toll of the last couple of days. Kyoko was utterly tired, exhaustion oozing through every molecule of her being. Placing her dominant hand on her forehead, she started to rub it, with her signifying her exhaustion truthfully to Makoto. All through one simple and shaky sigh.

Makoto stood, his eyes locked onto her for a moment. His eyes narrowed with pity. They disconnected from her and became downcast as he paced over to his bed, sitting on the opposite side from her.

Kyoko's eyes were closed, her hand still rubbing her head. It was as if she was mulling over something. Debating within her mind. Questioning and comparing. Makoto, on the other hand, stared at the carpet of his floor, his mind starting to expand and zone out.

There were no words being spoken.

Despite sitting on the same bed, they were millions of miles apart from each other. Something Makoto didn't want.

The silence nearly taking possession of the room as its own property, and even them if it wasn't for Makoto.

**_I'm doing it again..._**

"Kyoko?" His eyes kept down on the floor.

Her posture perked up hearing her voice. It was little, but it gave her a slight boost. Her back was still towards him.

"Hm? What is it?"

"Why did you come...here?" He started to fiddle with his fingers, some anxiety coming forth.

"Oh...I...I just wanted to make sure you were alright. Your face seemed a bit...greenish. And I wanted to ask about the trial."

A nervous chuckle came from his mouth, "Why are you worrying about me...? I'm not important right now, Kyoko..."

She dropped her head a little more, continuing on with her speech, "I think...I think I might have a general idea of who the Mastermind really and truthfully is. But, I know when we get to the trial, the first thing Monokuma is going to throw at us is—"

"Mukuro's murder." Makoto felt a tad bit hurt.

"Precisely."

"As far as everyone else goes, they still think it's us...well...not fully you know. Except for Hiro because you know, it's Hiro."

A light chuckle finally came from her mouth, "And Toko."

In return, one came from his.

The chuckles dispersed and silence took hold of the room again. This time, not as long as Makoto quickly spoke up.

"I'm sorry."

"For?" She knew already. Course she did.

"You already know, Kyoko."

Unbeknownst to Makoto, her dominate hand started to shake lightly. "...There's morning for you to apologize about."

"Course there is. I...I know how you feel, Kyoko."

A condescending snort, one she gained from Byakuya, came from her mouth. It wasn't on purpose, but that didn't stop it from hurting like it did. The condescending nature still oozed into her sentences, "What do you know about it. You'd never know anything about it."

Makoto gripped his pants, balling up into a fist. He could feel the malice in her tone. He knew she wasn't doing it on purpose, he's been around her long enough to know that Kyoko wasn't ever the best at conducting herself emotionally. This was just the first time that she...she was doing something remotely akin to...venting?

"I...I do know."

"Just because you're empathetic doesn't mean you can attempt to import my emotions onto yourself."

"No...not that. You remember when Monokuma made those videos? The ones that eventually led to Sayaka's...passing?"

"...How could I forget."

"Well, mine was of my family. My mom and father, so utterly happy at me coming here. Proud of their eldest, getting so lucky and having a chance to maybe...just maybe do something great. To be something great and stand outish." Makoto breathed out a gust of air, "Even my sister was there." He took a shaky breath. "Then they were all gone. Our house? Broken and rundown. The cool darkness of the night taking it over...there was nothing. Nothing at all. Gone as if they were never there in the first place."

Her back was still to his, but Kyoko's eyes took on a regretful appearance. "Makoto I—"

"No, it's fine. I get it." He slightly turned himself towards her, his voice seeming warmer to her. "That's why I'm so...worried for you. Just...please. Speak to me, alright?"

Makoto, quite honestly, didn't expect for that pleading effort to work. He had never been able to convince her before...so what was the difference now? That was what he thought.

A sharp and shaky breath came through her teeth, her eyes closed for one final time. They started to slowly flutter open. "I...I never thought he loved me."

Makoto's eyes were wide, struck still to his core. _**It worked? **_Even with his surprise, he still kept his silence.

"I just...I had so much I wanted to say to him. Just...so...so much. So much anger...so much ignorance to let loose." Her words started to choke in her throat. Her frustration mixed with sadness still ever present. "I...I missed him so much after these years. Even thinking about how he left me, all I would feel was anger, but the thought of eventually seeing him...made me happy. And now...I-I can't even...say what I've always wanted to say. What I've always wanted to say besides the anger." Her hand came down from her forehead and started to rub her eyes, minimizing the tears that were at bay.

Drooping his head, Makoto still maintained his silence. She was far from done. He could tell, easily.

**_She needs this. All I can do is just sit and listen. Like a good friend._**

A shaky and slow exhale came from her mouth, giving her slight solace as she tried her damnedest to piece her mind together.

"I've been thinking Makoto."

She was directly addressing him, he knew that immediately when he heard her tone of voice but...he couldn't will himself to speak back.

"...What if we..." She took another breather, "What if we were to lose...?"

Hearing doubt in Kyoko's voice, for the first ever time only paralyzed him more. Which made his nigh sickening worry for her increase tenfold. Quelling all the willpower he had, Makoto finally spoke. "We won't."

"But how do you even...know that? Who's to say your luck isn't going to work this time? Who's to say it's not going to work in the Mastermind's favor this time?"

Admittedly, that was a fair point. Makoto lowered his head in thought as he worked to piece together a rebuttal. Yet...before he could, Kyoko spoke.

"What if I speak to Monokuma...? Just to...see if they'll go easy on us? For...for forgiveness?"

Confusion and anger rushed through his veins, replacing that icy somberness and anxiety that had just started to make its home inside of him. The fiery nature caused Makoto to launch from his bedside, staring at Kyoko who still hadn't turned her back towards him.

"Wha-What? You're joking right, Kyoko?" She could feel the heat from his eyes locked onto her back. Her silence was a good enough indicator for Makoto.

"Please, you _have to be joking?"_

Silence once again.

This time more anger surged. "Who the **_hell _**are you!? The Kyoko I know would never, _**EVER **_sound so...dejected and scared! She would never be at this point of wanting to abandon everything she's been fighting for! Do you think your—"

It was so quick, but she snapped from her position on the bed to standing right in front of Makoto, tears being a hairsbreadth from rolling down her face. "D-Don't you dare, Makoto. Don't you...dare."

Makoto pushed his tongue against his teeth, rubbing it back and forth, his disappointment in himself for nearly going that far boldly displayed. "Th-Then why would you ever think about this?!"

"Because I'm tired Makoto! I'm tired of seeing people I care for die! If we win this trial, what's next!? Have you thought about that?! Have you _**EVER **_thought about what it'll be like in that outside world? What has changed?! And if we die? It'll all be for nothing. Remotely nothing. So, please. J-Just let me talk to Monokuma so that maybe we can—"

"_**NO!**_I-I can't let you do that Kyoko! Think about EVERYTHING that's happened since we got here! Think about Sayaka, Leon, Junko, Mondo, Chihiro, Sakura, your father! Think about their sacrifices! We owe it to them to—"

"And I owe it to myself to not see the rest of us killed! To not see _**YOU**_ killed Makoto! I won't...I wouldn't be able to..."

Shock started to paint itself across Makoto's face, soon it started to become dispelled as he stared into Kyoko's face. Her face lined with fresh tears.

**_Holding all of this in...I couldn't imagine..._**

"Look...Kyoko—"

Quickly, she collapsed in his arms, pulling him in for a hug. A tight one. It felt surreal for Makoto, but he quickly wrapped his arms around her, redistributing the tightness to her.

Tears were streaming down her face, with Makoto holding her tighter and burrowing his head next to her ear, whispering to her, _"Kyoko...you asked me how do I know? You're right, I don't know how my luck will work anymore. But that's the thing. It's not luck I place my faith in anymore. It's hope. It's always been hope. I've had the hope that we would solve who killed Sayaka. I've had the hope we would figure out what happened to Sakura. I've had the hope we would outsmart Monokuma. And we've done it. This time is no different. I have complete and utter hope that we're going to defeat Monokuma, and return back to where we belong."_ He started to rub her head lightly as he rocked her back and forth, placing his head on her shoulder. "All it really takes is having that hope. And taking a leap of faith. That's all it starts with."

He was right after all. All it took was a leap of faith. She felt like a fool for even considering that. A faint smile spread across her face.

They stayed like that for a while. Makoto's rocking, his voice and combined with his warmth...to Kyoko? It was rather nice. Even if they had to face the possible end of their lives, at least Kyoko had finally done something she wanted to do for a long while. Even then, her despair was...disappearing. Like Makoto was the antidote. As long as they had each other...despair would never take hold of them or their friends.

**_A/N:_**

**_Finally slowly getting back into the flow of things. Also, fun fact, all of my titles are song titles that I either listened to while writing or think fit the scene. I hope you enjoyed, and I should be back relatively soon._**


End file.
